Baby on Board

I am sure everyone who glances at this blog is aware that I am pregnant. Being as I will be half way through my pregnancy in less than 3 weeks time, I figured it’s time to get something posted (sorry, no pictures. I am waiting to be out of the “fat” stage and into the “pregnant” stage before posting anything).

I had my third doctor’s visit last Thursday. They told me that I was 17 weeks along. Throughout this whole process, I haven’t felt terribly informed by the doctors. In fact, this was the first time that anyone tangibly told me how far along I am. They are waiting for my 20 week ultrasound to say conclusively when my due date is, but right now it looks like it is sometime between April 23-30.

As the snow fell this past weekend, all I could think about was that when the snow starts to melt, there is going to be a baby on the cusp of being born. Not just any baby, MY baby! As far as emotions go, I still feel rather conflicted. Certainly, I am excited—excited to see my baby, excited to watch Scott become a father, excited to love and care for this new little person, but I am also very apprehensive—what sort of mother will I be? How will I be able to fluidly and naturally take on all the new responsibilities associated with having a child? How will we cope with all the financial demands and everyday logistics of having a child? There is just so much unknown, that at times it feels overwhelming. And yet, God has entrusted us with this new, little life, and we simply must trust Him. As one of my favorite hymns writes, “Oh for grace to trust Him more!”

We have our 20 week ultrasound/gender scan exactly three weeks from today. If anything is going to aid in my excitement level, this will definitely be it. I am eager to hang a little girl outfit or little boy outfit in the closet! We’ll then go to town on the things that really interest me—decorating a nursery! I have a lot of ideas running through my head, so we’ll just have to wait and see which anatomy little baby Johnson shares.